Favorite phrases you use

[Knepptune]

Why dont you put your purse down and actually hit it, gets used by us.

He's only got one brain and it aint real smart.

 

[Crummy]

Sharp tool safety-
"Avoid getting bloody, cut towards your buddy"

My best friend that was a site super-
"Watching you work is like watching someone trying to push a chain"

 

[DMiller]

Rightie tightie lefty loosie except for over ton trucks and Dodges!!

 

[DMiller]

Always torque to rated value then take 1/2 turn past squeal!

 

[92U 3406]

Torque spec:
braaaaaap!!! brap! brap!

 

[Jumbo]

Said of a worthless hand;
"He may be slow, but he sure is sloppy."

Said of a slow hand who probably is worthless
"You have to drive a stake to measure his progress."

Said of a very good hand;
"He's a fire and forget missile." Give him a job, you don't hear from him until it's done, faster than you thought. And, he tells you how he improved your idea and save money to boot. (Think I'll keep that one around a bit longer....)

 

[thepumpguysc]

The guys in the shop who were fed up w/ the way the customers were getting treated, start a new company moto>> WE'RE NOT HAPPY, UNTIL YOUR NOT HAPPY..
& then there was 1 of my favorites>>
WE'LL FIX YOUR EQUIPMENT IF IT TAKES EVERY PENNY YOU'VE GOT...

 

[dirty4fun]

My father used to say "he could worked all day in a hand basket" meaning never got much done.

When something went wrong it was It went to hell in a hand basket.

 

[thepumpguysc]

And "IF" my Aunt had a d**k she'd be my Uncle..
>said to people who were BIG on "if's"..
"if" you did this or "if" you had done that..

 

[DIYDAVE]

The driveway works both ways, when you get to the bottom, you can turn left or right, it makes no difference to me which way you turn...

What my grandfather used to say to people who wanted to dicker price down, on something he was selling...

 

[Tradesman]

I walked into a welding shop run by a crusty old guy with my dad one time just when the old man walked out the door and threw a piece of steel down into the swamp and told his customer in no uncertain terms if the f-ing thing isn't worth $5 bucks it's not worth anything and politely said hello what can I do for you today to my dad and myself . I have used that same logic many times since, though more politely

 

[farmerlund]

"we screw the other guy and pass the savings on to you"

Local bar had that on there sign for a couple years, made me laugh every time I drove by. I think I was the "other guy" Ha.

 

[crane operator]

" behind every beautiful woman, is a guy that's totally sick of her $hit."

I've got a co worker who can't but help stare at every girl that goes by, I try to give him a little reminder if I can.....

 

[92U 3406]

If its got tits, tires or tracks it's gonna be a pain in the ass.

 

[Junkyard]

And "IF" my Aunt had a d**k she'd be my Uncle..
>said to people who were BIG on "if's"..
"if" you did this or "if" you had done that..

If I had wheels I'd be a wagon. That's the other I hear in those "if" instances.

 

[crewchief888]

thats gonna leave a mark....
are ya drunk, stoned or just stupid?

once while i was sitting in my service truck on the phone with my boss during an ice/sleet storm...
"thats gonna start hurting & bleeding as soon as my hand thaws out"

it did, as i watched blood trickling down onto my paperwork...

 

[DMiller]

'Not the sharpest tool in the shed', 'if he had half a brain he'd be dangerous', 'Question, did your folks have any kids that lived?', 'Bad waste of good air'.

 

[Tradesman]

That would drive an old mare to bite her colt.
Purdier than a new born Hereford calf.

 

[Crummy]

If you need me I'll be in the can giving birth to another [boss/apprentice/truck driver/equipment operator...]

 

[DMiller]

We called that building a helper!! Always failed and was flushed!